Life Advice for My Daughters

As a father of daughters, I have no business teaching them how to become a good woman. I can, however, teach them how they should be treated by men, and how they can prepare themselves to survive the harsh reality that is our society.

-Find a man worthy of your love and respect to marry, then give it to him freely. Save your love and respect for him.


-Being a strong woman doesn’t mean being able to do the same things a man can do. Embrace your femininity, and be strong in who God made you to be. 

-Don’t get involved with a man who is weak, whether it’s physically, mentally, or spiritually. Find a man who is strong in his faith, mind, and body, then support him in his desire to be even stronger. If you feel sorry for him, treat him with kindness, but he’s not strong enough for you to spend your life with him.


-Avoid women who complain about their husbands. They’re poison, and their husbands are pretty much always miserable. 


-If you’ve found a man you’re interested in romantically, it helps to impress the mother. Be the kind of woman she would want for her son.


-Learn to cook. A good hot meal will do wonders for your family, and encourages sharing and conversation around the table.


-Avoid guys who only hang out with girls. If they don’t have the respect of other men, there’s a reason.


-I’ve never looked back on my life and wished that my wife would have slept with me before we were married. I’m glad she respected herself enough to wait, and I’ve never regretted it. If a boy tries to convince you to sleep with him before marriage, he doesn’t respect you enough. A man should treat your purity with honor.


-You were not made to be a combatant. A woman’s role centralizes on giving life and nurturing it. Having said that, be ready to defend yourself and your family. In this culture, you can’t always depend on a man being around to save you. Learn to be proficient with a gun and a knife, at least well enough to stop a threat and get you and your family to safety.


-In the workplace, you will be judged on your appearance, and probably more harshly than a man is judged. It is a reality of the world, especially if you work with men. Look professional rather than slutty. Be proficient enough in your job that any promotion or advancement can be credited to your skill and work ethic, rather than a low-cut top.


-Be able to work outside of the home. Again, you can’t always count on a man being there to provide for you, so learn a trade.


-Having said that, your primary role should eventually be that of a wife and a mother. It’s a noble and necessary goal, no matter how much it gets downplayed in our society.


-Dress modestly and professionally. Leave room for imagination. You can’t control the thoughts and actions of others, but it helps to avoid the attentions of bad men.


-Learn to sew and repair clothing.


-If a man (or woman) opens the door for you, look him in the eye, smile, and say, “Thank you.”


-Plant a food garden. It’s more worth your time than flowers, and you’ll be more proud of the food you cook.


-Don’t get too busy outside of the home. Learn to say “No” so you can put your family first.


-If a boy tries to make you feel unloved or unlovable because you refuse to do something he wants, remember that God loves you perfectly. Also, your daddy loves you, and I’m a better man than that boy.


-Having said that, God isn’t your boyfriend. Learn a healthy fear of your Creator.


-How you treat your husband around his friends drastically affects how they view him. Never disrespect him in front of his friends. Give him something to brag about to his buddies when you leave the room.


-If a man hits you once, he’ll do it again.


-In a marriage, a woman is a valuable member of a team, not an indentured servant.


-A woman travelling alone is a target. Travel in groups.


 -Always keep an eye out for people following you. Double back, change speeds, and change directions to find a tail. Be a hard target.


-Hollywood has dumb, unrealistic ideas about love and romance, and love songs are usually wrong too. These ideas are often written by people with failed relationships. Study marriages that have lasted decades instead.


-If you meet a woman whose husband loves, adores, and cherishes her, hand out with her and take notes. She’s obviously doing something right.
-When in doubt, look at your mom. If you act like her, you can’t go wrong.

Additional words from my father;

Don’t just choose to follow Jesus by simply going to church; pursue Him. He will give you the BEST picture of what a man looks like, and will also help you discern who is and isn’t a godly man. He sets the bar high; don’t lower it. Don’t settle. He will lead you to the right man to be your life partner.

Words from my buddy Patrick Hanley;

Respect is a man’s primary need. Love is yours. Show him respect and he will know you love him.  

Save your love and your body for the man you’re going to spend the rest of your life with. It’s a one time gift to give.  

Learn to play golf. It’s awesome.

The life you see on Pinterest and Facebook is not reality. Don’t get caught up chasing an unattainable fantasy. Be content with who you are, where you are, whom you have, and what you’re doing. (Who? Whom? I think it’s “whom”. But whom cares…whatever. I hate grammar.)


3 Comments Add yours

  1. Lois Stauffer says:

    Good Words!


  2. Randy says:

    Kathy Small – is the reason I read it. I have 1 daughter and another on the way, love this!


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